CG is a high-class-pure-vegetarian. You know, the Saravana Bhavan types. Because of his *ahem ahem* delicate nature, I never miss an opportunity to remind him about the mouth watering meat delicacies he’s missing out on (in my honesty, it was more of shoving it in his face).
Me: Man, I’m craving for a Shawarma!
CG: Uh huh…
Me: Wanna go and get some Shawarma?
CG: Yeah sure…
Me: Oh no, you can’t have any because there’s no such thing as a vegetarian Shawarma!
CG: Damn…. Fine.…
Me: Yeah! Score!
Me: We should go to Millers46 sometime.
CG: Sounds like a plan.
Me: Their steaks are out of this world! You should try some!
CG: Okay.. Sure…
Me: Oh no! You can’t! Because there’s no such thing as a vegetarian steak! Even what restaurants serve as vegetarian steak is an abomination! Steak implies meat! Ergo, vegetarian steak is an oxymoron!
CG: Seesh! You don’t have to be such a d*ck about it!
Me: Yay! Steak!
Match Point: Carnivores
Me: Let’s go to KFC!
CG: No way.
Me: Why not?
CG: Because their vegetarian food is awful.
Me: C’mon! It’s KFC! How can you not love their tender juicy chicken, deep fried with the Colonel’s Secret Recipe?
Me: Oh yeah, you have no idea what I’m talking about!
CG: Dude! Knock it off!