Diamonds Are Womens Best Friend

I was 14 years old and I was religiously studying for my Science final exam. The chapter was on crystals.

There was a line that I didn’t quite understand. ‘Diamonds have a very high cleavage‘.

Too lazy to open the dictionary, I asked my dad, hoping that he would shed some light on this mystery.

Me: Dad?

Dad: Yeah?

Me: What does cleavage mean?

Dad: Where did you learn that word?

Me: From my science textbook.

Dad: Ok. Cleavage means, ummmmmm….. Ummmmm… It means…. Ummmmm…. How do I say it? I think you better check the dictionary.

Left with no option, I opened the good old Oxford dictionary. This is what it said.

Cleavage: (\ˈklē-vij\) The depression between a woman’s breasts especially when made visible by a low-cut neckline.

Me: Man, this dictionary is wrong! Womans breasts it seems! Seesh!

Fast forward six years later.

GF: Oh baby! You should buy me a diamond solitaire!

Me: For what joy?

GF: So that I can show off! Imagine the how beautiful my neck will look! Not to mention the cleavage!

Me: Cleavage huh? Interesting. Oh wait! Now everything makes sense! The connection between men, cleavage and diamonds.

GF: What you thinking about baby? The diamond solitaire?

Me: Yeah, sure baby.

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