Once a month, I take my parents out to dinner or lunch, whatever works better for me. No place fancy, either a place like Huckleberry or Herbs & Spice – you get the drift. My dad prefers that I drive, so that he can drink in peace without having to worry about getting caught for a DUI. Like all dads, my dad loves commenting on everything and offering advice that I don’t need.
Dad: You mind driving a bit slower. You might damage your suspension.
Me: Chill, besides I’m super hungry.
Dad: I hear an ambulance, move to the left lane and let it pass.
Me: I don’t see anything in the mirror.
Dad: It’s behind us, I can hear the siren.
Me: Ummmmm. you might wanna have your glasses checked.
Dad: My hearing is perfectly fine! You mind turning the music down, then you might hear it too!
(I dial the volume knob down)
Me: Still can’t hear anything!
Dad: Oh wait! That was your music!
Me: Dafaq!
A Diary Of A Whiny Guy 