All Good Things Must Come To An End…..

It’s with a heavy heart that I announce that EOD today, I will not be posting on this blog anymore.

We had a great run, we had our good times and bad, but as the old folks say, “All good things, must come to an end”.

It was fun interacting with you all, my readers. I wasn’t really sure how my blog would be perceived, but the feedback I got from you all, gave me confidence. And I thank you all for that.

So what’s next for me?

Well, I promised myself something if I were to across 2000 hits.

The first thing was that, I’ll take a short trip to Gokarna. My birthday is coming  up :D !

The second thing was, I’ll get myself a domain. And that I did!

And I give you, *Drum Rolls*

http://diaryofawhinyguy.com

*Stadium Crowd Applause*

*Me Blushing*

‘Awwwwww, Shucks’……. – Whiny Guy

For those who are like, #facepalm| It’s not like you didn’t see this coming. :P

Anyhow, I’ve moved this blog to a self hosted site and will be blogging from there!

So change your bookmarks to: http://diaryofawhinyguy.com

Stalk me on Facebook: http://on.fb.me/112rSEN

Follow me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheWhinyGuy

Catch me on Indiblogger: http://www.indiblogger.in/blogger/52291/

Or simply write to me at: thewhinyguy@gmail.com

See you all there!

PS: If you wanna know, why I’m being so dramatic? Well, it’s a Sunday evening, I’m drunk on half a bottle of Old Monk and it seemed like  a good idea. 

PPS: All comments have been imported as of 26.05.13, 18:10. So continue commenting!

PPPS: Y’all need to re-subscribe to my blog. (I know, it’s such a pain)

PPPPS: Tell your friends about my blog! I can’t tell mine, then they’ll know that I’ve been writing about them :P 

PPPPPS: The site is still undergoing design, so don’t be hating! 

PPPPPPPS: My glass is empty. Need a refill. 

BYE! 

happy-thumbs-up-l

More Power To You!

I was at the local franchise of Five Star Chicken, picking up some dinner for myself. There was a bit of a wait, but thank god, there was only one  guy infront of me.

Random Guy: I’d like two pieces of Crunchy Masala Chicken.

Chicken Guy: That’ll be 84 rupees , sir.

Random Guy: 84! The menu says that it’s 39 rupees per piece. So two pieces should be 78 rupees! 

Chicken Guy: Sir, taxes not included in the price.

Random Guy: Where it does say that!

Chicken Guy: Here! 

*Points at the menu card which explicitly mentions that local taxes are added to the mentioned price*

Random Guy: I don’t want to pay tax! 

Chicken Guy: Errr…

Me: Yay! More power to the common man! Yeah, screw the system! Yeah, f*** the government! 

*What I thought was a murmur under my breath, was actually shouted out pretty loud. Loud enough to catch the attention of nearby shoppers*

*Chicken Guy and Random Guy give me a look as if I’d just escaped from the loony bin*

Me: Errr, I’ll have whatever he’s having. I’ll pay the taxes too!

(So much for being anti-authoritarian)

pokerface_clean

PS: Their chicken is really good. If you’re in Bangalore, try them out!

PPS: No, I’m not being paid to advertise them. Though it would be super cool.

You Don’t Say!

CG is a pig when it comes to cleanliness. (Sorry Bro, but you know that’s the truth). And I’ve been trying to get him to clean his room for about a year now.

*I enter his room*

Me: Dude, when was the last time you changed your sheets?

CG: Haven’t done it yet. 

Me: Huh? How many times have you changed your sheets after moving into this house?

CG: That’s what I said! Haven’t done it yet. 

Me: Oh god! How are you still alive?

*I give his bedsheet a nice whack and a thick layer of dust rises* (I’m not making this up!)

Me: God save us all!

CG: Whatever….

*I open his wardrobe next*

Me: Man! Is something dead in here!?

CG: Quit making stuff up!

Me: It smells like a zoo in here!

CG: Oh please! It’s just my unwashed clothes.

Me: Why are they in the wardrobe? They should be in the laundry basket!

CG: Yeah yeah yeah! I’ll put it there!

Me: Alteast put a freshener or something in here!   

CG: Jeez! What am I, an aristocrat or something? 

Me: You wish!

*Next, I open his table drawer*

Me: Why is your toothbrush and paste in your drawer?

CG: I don’t know. I just keep it there.

Me: And there are cigarette packets in there, and some change and your comb! 

CG: Yeah so?

Me: And you put that thing in YOUR MOUTH!

CG: Dude! Stop nagging! You ain’t my girlfriend!

Me: You don’t say!

CG: #facepalm  

youdontsay

Aftermath: I’m afraid to enter CG’s room without a hazard suit!

You Shall Not Watch!

Last Friday, my friends were supposed to drop into my place for a house party, which unfortunately DID NOT happen. Their excuses varied from “I’m depressed because Arsenal is not going to win the premier league this season” to “my neighbors cat died”.

Anyways, the result was this:  I had an empty house (except for CG and MS), a lot of food and a lot of booze. As pissed as I was, I decided to get *sloshed drunk*, to calm myself down. CG and MS decided to make me watch a movie to soothe my nerves. After a lot of debating, they decided on The Lord Of The Rings: The Fellowship Of The Ring.

When it comes to the Stars Wars Vs Lords Of The Ring, I’m pro Star Wars!

*The movie starts playing*

Narrator: In the beginning of time, there were three rings for the Elves, seven rings for the Dwarfs and nine rings for the Humans.

Me: What do these rings do?

CG: I’ll explain it to you later. It’s kinda long.

Me: Pfft..!

CG: Dude, just watch!

Me: Where are these rings now?

CG: The elves hid their rings, dwarfs lost four of their rings and have three rings left. And the humans wore their rings and they became the Ringwraiths.

Me: Stupid humans!

*One Peg Down*

GandalfA wizard is never late, nor is he early, he arrives precisely when he means to.

Me: Yeah, right! Try giving that as an excuse to your mom, when you’re returning home drunk at 2 am!

CG: Hahaha.

*Two Pegs Down*

Me: Why does Bilbo Baggins never wear that ring?

CG: Because he has no lust for power.

Me: I see…. Smart guy. How come the eye of Sauron always on?

CG: Because that’s how he can sense the ring.

Me: Does it ever blink?

CG: Dude! C’mon! That’s stupid!

Me: Uh..huh..

*Four Pegs Down*

Me: Dude, have you noticed that the Hobbits have no facial hair?

CG: Uh..huh..

Me: Imagine, they’d go to a barber to get their legs shaved instead!

CG: Dude! F*** off! Just watch!

*Five Pegs Down*

Me: Dude, why don’t just fly to Mordor on that big bird thing?

CG: Because air travel was expensive back then.

Me: Yeah right…. Don’t f*** around man!

CG: Then stop asking me stupid questions and read the book!

Me: It’s not stupid! It’s a genuine question!

CG: I’m not going to dignify that with a response!

Me: C***!

*Seven Pegs Down*

Me: Look dude! Ned Stark!

CG: Dude, that’s Boromir! The son of the steward of Gondor!

Me: Same person!

CG: Aaaaaaaagh! Dude!

*Eight Pegs Down*

Legolas: This is no mere Ranger. He is Aragorn, son of Arathorn. You owe him your allegiance.

Boromir: Aragorn? This is Isildur‘s heir?

Me: Snap! You didn’t see that coming, did ya?

CG: Jesus Christ! How drunk are you?

Me: Thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis much!

CG: #facepalm!

*Nine Pegs Down*

Boromir: One does not simply walk into Mordor. Its black gates are guarded by more than just Orcs. There is evil there that does not sleep. The Great Eye is ever watchful. It is a barren wasteland, riddled with fire, ash, and dust. The very air you breathe is a poisonous fume. Not with ten thousand men could you do this. It is folly.

Me: No shit, Sherlock!

CG: Dude, SHUT UP MAN!

Me: You shut up, you ************************************************************** (too many vulgar explicits).

CG: Jeez! You kiss your mom with that mouth?

*Ten Pegs Down*

CG: Don’t you think Hugo Weaving did a good portrayal of  Elrod’s character?

MS: Yeah man, his acting is good.

Me: Yeah man! I friggin’ love Hugo Weaving man! I love him in V for Vendetta! I love him in the Transformer! And I love him in The Matrix! Yeah! Agent Smith!

CG: Seesh! Drunk much?

MS: The Matrix?

Me: Yeah! Agent Smith man! Agent f***ing Smith!

MS: Nope! Haven’t seen Matrix.

Me: You what? Haven’t seen The Matrix? How the hell are you still living with yourself?

MS: Errrrr…

Me: Screw this shit! Lets watch Matrix instead!

CG: Ummmmmm, Hello!  We were watching LOTR!

Me: You’re damn right! Were, as in past tense! Now we ‘are’ watching The Matrix!

CG: Aaaaaaaaaagh! You drunk **************************************************************************! (Vulgar explicits, I’m sure you’ve already guessed that!).

images

Burn It To The Ground!

My younger brother loves to borrow my clothes. I’m sure we all have younger siblings who’d do the same.

During one of his night outs, he decides to borrow one of jackets / pullovers.

*He opens my wardrobe*

Bro: Sad, sad, sad, god this is ugly, sad, sad… 

Me: Dude, if you don’t like anything, you can leave. 

Bro: I’m sure I’ll like something in this heap.

Me: Uh huh, suit your yourself. 

Bro: Ugh.! What is this sh*t!?

Me: It’s a tennis jacket.

Bro: Why is green in color?

Me: Because I like green. 

Bro: It’ll looks like something that someone from the ‘hood would wear and go all gansta! You know what I mean?

Me: Dude! I’m busy, if don’t like what you see, you can leave!

Bro: Chill bro! Anyways, I think I’ll take this badass tennis jacket of yours. 

Me: So changed your mind, is it? 

Bro: No, I’m just gonna burn this piece of sh*t to the ground! 

Me: Errrr, I don’t I’m ok with you borrowing my clothes anymore. 

pokerface_clean